A babyfull post

Because it covers a lot, this post is put into sections for ease in reading.

Section 1: The squishy sappy

       I've never been much of a sap, but I must admit I'm starting to feel quite squishy and sappy about my baby. She's just so big now and I can feel her so much. More precisely, I can make out her entire body through my tummy and I can feel her every time she moves. I feel her fits of hiccups she gets twice a day (poor girl inherited my over-active diaphragm), and I can feel when she's all cramped when I sit wrong. I know when she's sleeping, and I can usually tell when she's playing.
       I still don't even call her a name besides baby girl, because she doesn't really need a name aside from that. She is my baby girl and I take care of her. Sam takes care of her too, he rubs my belly and pokes her as often as he can. He also tries to scare her when she has the hiccups by yelling "boo!" at my belly or shaking it back and forth; it's truly adorable.
       I no longer get localized pokey kicks, but my whole belly moves when she moves now. I'm just surprised at how much I love this horribly uncomfortable mass in my stomach. I feel like I know her and I just love her times ten. I feel just SO lucky and blessed to have her in my life and we really can't wait to meet her. I can't believe it will happen so soon.
       Melea and heather gave my baby a really soft teddy bear for the baby shower and I put it in her crib to await her arrival. I find myself tucking that silly bear into her covers at least two times a week as if it's a baby -apparently I'm a 5 year old girl when I'm not paying attention. The second I realize I just tucked a doll into crib covers, I roll my eyes and pretend I didn't just do that.

Section 2: The flip side of the baby coin.

       I'm really glad that my maternal instincts have kicked in to the extent that they have, because it helps me overlook how horribly uncomfortable I am and how miserable my poor body feels. Before I was pregnant, there was only 6 1/2 inches of space between my sternum and my pelvis. There is now a 16-inch, 3 or 4 pound baby occupying that small area. My pregnant belly doesn't really "wear high" or "wear low", it simply wears OUT. The rare times she's not sitting up in my ribs tearing them apart and squishing my lungs, she's down low making me feel like I need a trip to labor and delivery to get her adjusted out the parts of me I'd prefer to keep to myself (not to mention the damage that causes). Lovely images I'm sure... but pregnancy just makes me too honest and shameless- it's SO how it feels.
       Breathing has become my number one struggle. I just feel SO suffocated 80% of the time. I cant even sit up in a chair for longer than 15 minutes without starting to see spots and feeling my heartbeat throbbing in my head.
       I can't stand up off the couch without assistance and if I try to, I mostly just lay there like a beetle on its back wiggling back and forth in a lost battle to be on its feet again. Pretty much anything I do now is accompanied by a grunt or a wheeze as I lean over to do it. I attempted to cut my own toenails last night and nearly died in the attempt. If I drop a pen or something, I now just call sam in the other room to come and pick it up for me- it's just not worth the pain to lean over and do it myself. Sam truly is an angel though. He does things for me and picks things up without even acting like it's an abnormal request to do for someone who's sitting a foot away.

Section 3: It could be much worse

       With all the discomfort though, I still feel extremely blessed compared to how bad it is for other girls in my same situation. Luckily I'm still sleeping well. I lay on my back or on either side or whatever makes me feel comfortable. I'm falling asleep within a half hour of laying down, and I fall right back asleep after my 3-4 bathroom trips I have to take each night. I've only just started to get hip/tailbone/sciatic pain, but it's actually less than what I had when I wasn't pregnant. I've even been lucky enough to almost completely escape the heartburn and constipation that most women get during pregnancy. I've never had any morning sickness and my moods haven't been topsy turvy in any way. I'm essentially just an immobile, rounder version of my previous self.

Section 4: How it all fits together

       So I just decided to post about how things are going and progressing. Yes, I'm horribly uncomfortable, but I'm actually happier and more spiritual feeling than I have ever been. I love my little baby so much and I love my husband for taking care of the two of us as well as he does. Being pregnant's been such a huge blessing and we're just overwhelmed by how wonderful god's gifts can be, even when they come with struggles and discomfort.